Records : My Smack

But I Really Love This One

2011-06-13T00:53:00.003-05:00

I didn't buy Orbison's previous releases, but I really love this one. Jels definitely has 'it' : sweet melodies from what sounds like several different instruments (synth, organ, and piano sounds) driven forward with a booming kick and a tasteful vocal phrase. Is that clap from a real TR-808, a clone, or a sample...?
GORGEOUS!

Attitude

2011-06-08T04:59:00.004-05:00

Marco Shuttle hits a grand slam with "The Vox Attitude". It was just repressed, so buy it immediately before it sells out again. 'Cause it will. The a-side /title track is such a gem. This will easily remain one of my favorite tracks of 2011.

I Miss Four Tet

2010-10-13T19:33:00.004-05:00

Incredible...

Eh...

Unknown Artists

2010-08-31T01:02:00.004-05:00

Damn, how did I miss this one? Oh right. I don't live in Detroit and this was pressed in some micro-quantity. The DJ Genesis track Bipolar is my favorite on this Psychostasia compilation ep.

Horrorshow

2010-08-30T03:03:00.004-05:00

All the Demdike Stare releases are sick as fuck. Need to drop a hundo to get the first twelve? Do it. Their latest Liberation Through Hearing is more of the same: pure aural brilliance. Miles Whittaker (MLZ) and Sean Canty are producing gem after gem.
And triple-high-fives to Loop-o (Andreas at Dubplates & Mastering, Berlin) for cutting another ace lacquer.

This Hurts

2010-08-11T03:55:00.004-05:00

Delsin, damn reliable as usual, offers up this fine release by DJ Yoav B.
Higher Love will be caressed lovingly by my intoxicated fingers, swooning with uncompromising and--dare I say--incomparable desire to share This with the world.

A Sexual Position

2010-08-07T18:54:00.010-05:00

Oh what, did the "Charlie Brown" sample throw you off? Fuck you. That's the best re-contextualization of a sample I've heard in a real long time.

Kris, this is genius.
Keep it coming.
Take your time.

---
(Kids, if you didn't understand the title reference, this is CAT: morris audio 69.)
(And Bitch, if you buy this I'll smack it out of your unworthy hands.)
----
P.S ~ Kris Wadsworth's remix of Jimmy Edgar's latest Hot, Raw, Sex is a sleazy electro house killer.

Aquarius

2010-08-04T23:00:00.001-05:00

Just because it's the BEST JUNGLE TRACK EVER doesn't mean anyone gives a shit when I play it out. But I do. I care.
Jah bless you, Rupert Parkes. I miss your Photek days.

Please Press Me A Proper One

2010-07-21T19:17:00.005-05:00

All copies of Patern Repeat 00/1 that I have purchased have terrible surface noise plaguing both sides. Since there was a test pressing approved by people with hearing, I can only assume this a pressing defect due to poor pressing. Are all copies fucked? If you have a copy that does not have this surface noise, PLEASE CONTACT ME IMMEDIATELY. I adore this record and would love to play it out.

Formula

2010-06-14T04:32:00.004-05:00

If someone had said "minimal techno" ten years ago to me, I would have immediately thought of Thomas Brinkmann, Rich Hawtin, and the Voigt brothers. Probably in that order. Not that these are the only producers who were focusing on stripped-down beats, but they were prominent in my world of then-ago. Nowadays it seems that "minimal" means something very different. Minimal techno is no longer stripped-down and raw but instead it is skippy hi-hats, delayed tom patterns, and Ableton Live presets. And this record, expertly-crafted, is an anthem for this 'new' techno that came in and out of fashion almost as quickly as white rappers in the 90s. Dusty Kid is a talented producer. These tracks are so goddamn clever. And that's exactly why I'm selling my copy.

Really Kranky...Can I Stop Holding My Goddamn Breath Now?

2010-05-07T00:47:00.006-05:00

Holy shit finally Kranky presses Loscil on vinyl. For fuck's sake. They couldn't do it earlier? Oh was Submers not a complete masterpiece worthy of the black satin sex grooves!?! I could have sworn it was. Anyway, here we fucking go at last...

Endless Falls is more Scott Morgan brilliance. As usual.
Buy the wax. It has a bonus track not featured on the cd release and sounds better than those mpfrees you downloaded from Soulseek or some torrent site, you pirating fuck.

Self-Enforced Mental Preparation For Upcoming Gig

2010-05-01T04:48:00.002-05:00

If they don't love these records
fuck 'em.

123 Is The New 128

2010-04-24T02:56:00.005-05:00

Side B of Jens Zimmermann's A/B on Snork is the kind of sprawling, subtle affair that's easy to love these days. It sounds more like an excerpt from a jam than a carefully-structured composition. Free-flowing and smooth with that rolling bassline that's very similar to Villalobos's For Disco Only 2.

I got up at 3pm today and was running late. I ran out the door, throwing on a sweater with no shirt and shoes with no socks. I rushed into my car and my new Ray-Bans had fallen out of the car door in that half-second before it shut. I heard a 'crush' when I backed out of the driveway but didn't have time to stop and see what it was. When I returned I clearly saw my broken sunglasses. Amazing thing, the lens didn't crack, so I put it back in the mangled frame. They look beat up. And maybe I can identify with that and it endears them to me. Like they weren't really mine until I ran over them.

For Some Reason It Isn't Funny When He Wears His Mask In That Slices Interview

2010-04-09T22:37:00.006-05:00

I'm surprised that Dog Days is still so affordable. It's a great record and three years old already.
In fact, I'm surprised that most Redshape releases can still be purchased for under USD$15.

Trying To Decide What Is Crucial And What Isn't.

2010-02-16T22:25:00.001-06:00

Most of it probably isn't.
You gotta dig deeper to make selecting easier. Some people think digging wastes time, but they don't get it. And I don't expect them to.

Solid Minimal

2010-02-05T05:40:00.005-06:00

Takuya Morita's Woman And Shadow is minimal techno that doesn't suck like all those S_nim and Italian releases. Buy it on D i s c o g s right now for two bucks plus the cost of convenient shipping to your home, you lazy fuck.

Dark Horse

2010-01-30T17:49:00.003-06:00

Pay more attention to Anders Ilar. He's been modestly releasing great records for nearly a decade; I own at least 8 of them. I love the dark, sometimes acidic, and always delicious sounds from this guy. Speaking of which, his contribution to Radio Recordings Four is my favorite track on that compilation. The bassline is deep and sinister. The tempo is slow and easy. Anyone have a copy of the 2x12" for trade? Need that one.
Looks like Resident Advisor hosted an Ilar mix last year. That's cool. I don't really pay attention to stuff like that. When it comes to taste, I'm an island. Aren't you? In fact, why are you reading this...? Go find your own gems.
Nah, kidding. Share The Love, kids!

Rhythm & Sound - Roll Off

2010-01-14T23:19:00.004-06:00

I've bought five copies of this record. They all have (unintended) surface noise throughout side S, the silver side. Inscribed is "D & M" so the masters were cut at Dubplates & Mastering. Does anyone have a copy without the repetitive surface noise on side S? I'm hoping that there was more than one black vinyl pressing, and it's possible to get a copy without the pressing defect. Or maybe there are copies in the same run that sound fine. Do all my copies sound like shit because the stampers were used for too many pressings, and my copies came off the tail end of that run...?
Hmm... Quite the quandary.
Does the limited white/grey marbled pressing have this defect as well? I'm just curious. I can't afford that one anyway.

~ Daddy Peacebucks

I Love Too Much

2010-01-12T05:42:00.005-06:00

Steve Mizek recently articulated everything I've been thinking about these last few years concerning the growing ease of producing and releasing music, and the problems that the underground dance music community are now having to deal with due to this inflated "abundance". Unfortunately, we aren't finding solutions to minimize the mountains of crap music now being released.
At least record-only releases made the quest for gems possible due to the demands of pressing wax. Pressing a record meant making a commitment to the music. Now it's gotten out of hand with hundreds of thousands of digital labels. And with all the cheap/free software available, anyone can make a hundred tracks in a couple months for under a grand, with a decent laptop and an inexpensive midi controller.

Without further ado...
http://www.littlewhiteearbuds.com/the-trouble-with-abundance/

Reality hurts.

808 The Bass Queen

2010-01-09T22:47:00.009-06:00

Yesterday I picked up Egyptian Lover - D.S.L.'s from a local record store for USD$2.50. Original picture sleeve, VG+ after I cleaned it up. Not a particularly valuable record. At least not at the moment. Understandable, as it is quite dated with a bit of frommage. Production-wise, however, this record is timeless. The sound coming from these cuts stands in stark, authoritative contrast to most productions today which are made and mixed digitally. Egyptian Lover's classic 808 programming punches right through the mix.

Even after seeing the suggestive cover artwork, it still took me a minute to figure out what the letters of the title track mean. Duh. I'm slow sometimes. My mind must be elsewhere...

"Sorry For The Delay" (Grizzly Bear)

2010-01-07T16:32:00.002-06:00

No worries.
You more than made up for it.

Soylent Night

2009-12-27T22:28:00.007-06:00

She was being verbally abusive again. I repeatedly asked her not to speak to me like that. After eating dinner at her parents' home she continued to speak to me in a disrespectful and dehumanizing manner, so I got out of her Audi. Of course, this upset her and she chased me down the street, yelling into the silent suburban air. I refused to go back to the car. I told her if she wanted me to go with her, she could pick me up where I stood. I was being incredibly stubborn, but I had a damn good reason for my behavior. She went back to the car and I stood around for a bit, thinking maybe she would pick me up. She did not return, and I was glad. I decided, masochistically, that I needed a physical reminder of my emotional pain. So I went walking and kept walking.

I was lost. I waved my arms and tried to ask people at intersections for directions. I tried asking politely. I tried shouting. But no one wanted to help because Boulder is the most self-absorbed land on Earth. Exactly where I belonged in that moment. I walked miles in the wrong directions. Eventually I went into a hospital emergency room because that's all I could find that was open before 6am on Christmas Day. The guy at the front desk gave me directions so I could walk back and get my shit from her house before driving back to my apartment.

I walked at least 15 miles, from 2am - 9am, in zero degree weather, and She wanted to have a 'conversation' when I got to her house. She wanted to know why I left her car even though I had already told her exactly why. And no answer I gave satisfied her. She wasn't letting me leave her room. I had my things in my arms and couldn't physically move her from the doorway. Even when I successfully moved her a couple feet away, I'd try to open the door and she would slam it shut. I was incredibly exhausted after walking all night and She had slept. I tried to escape through a bedroom window, but She pulled me away. I was left with two options: Break her. Or break her things and hopefully She would let me leave. Well, I'm not going to hit her, so I told her if she didn't let me go I would start kicking shit. She didn't let me go. I started kicking shit. And She still didn't let me leave until, finally, her roommates came in and asked me to go, and all I could say to them was "THANK YOU THANK YOU" as I got the rest of my stuff and left. One of them said, "I know it's not your fault" as I was escaping, so perhaps her roommates understood what was happening better than I could. Perhaps they observed similar reigns of control over her previous lovers.
"She makes all her boyfriends miserable."
She's "Harsh." "Demanding." "Insensitive." She's an "uncompromising bitch."
"Didn't anyone tell you not to date [her] before you moved here?"
No.
But if someone had warned me, would I have bothered to listen? Love is blind as They say.

I moved here to have a relationship with her, play music for people, and escape the Midwest.
At least I accomplished one of my goals.

You are right, Levon.
Woman is The Devil.

Damn.
I love women, and one terrible incident isn't going to make me start hating all women. I just don't think I'll be dating any more Aries girls. Fire and water don't mix. Remember that, kids.
Or don't. It's your life. Find out for yourself. How many things would you have done differently, had someone warned you beforehand?
I have no regrets.

RIP Minimal Man

2009-11-21T19:47:00.004-06:00

Ian David Loveday died last June. I only found out just now. He worked with Baby Ford and was one-half of Minimal Man. That last release on Sender was sick, and I was always a fan of "Treatment Feel". Damn, a lot of people died this summer.

Unsung

2009-11-21T17:53:00.007-06:00

The most reserved member of the Modern Love family has produced what may be my favorite track on the label. This is no small accomplishment, considering how much I love all the Modern Love releases. Then again, maybe "Night Jewel" is my favorite right now 'cause it's new. I'll concede that. Nevertheless, it's a fucking astounding piece of techno mastery. Thank you, Mr. Stott.

Full Of Grace

2009-11-07T17:39:00.005-06:00

Jouem - Volume Two - Levitation EP is ridicuously good. And yes, I understand there's a deep house trend that's hitting the UK and especially Germany right now, and trends tend to produce a lot of watered-down clones of a few truly astonishing works. Well, this Jouem release is truly astonishing. I'd be proud to shelve this one at the top with my Driftwood records. It's at least that good but in a different way. A bit more atmospheric and textural with lots of reverb on the mid-high percussion. Also, it's a slower tempo affair; both tracks play at 112BPM which will keep a lot of the non-risk-taking (ie: boring) djs away.
Whatever. Sounds like God.

Finally

2009-11-02T19:45:00.002-06:00

STL on Echospace. More djs must be taking notice.

How Make '£' With American Keyboard?

2009-10-21T02:19:00.004-05:00

Trulz & Robin - Turn My Head 12" on Discogs right now for £0.99.
Great record. Great steal for a UK resident.

Zen

2009-10-20T04:37:00.002-05:00

Deal Of The Day

2009-10-19T04:39:00.004-05:00

Mountain People - Mountain003 12" for $13.99 on Discogs. If you live in UK/Europa there's plenty of copies for sale, so you needn't worry. For us Usians, however, fourteen bucks and shipping buys a record that's worth every last goddamn cent.
I would buy this, but I already have at least two copies.
Anybody got an "Anonymous Release" 2, 3, or 4 they want to trade?
I got plenty of records to choose from.

Invisible Bitchslap

2009-10-12T23:20:00.004-05:00

I'd say Levon Vincent's Invisible Bitchslap [Deconstruct 01] is my favorite record of 2009 but it was released in late 2008. So I'll just say it's my favorite record of this last year. Better yet, it's one of my favorite records ever. So there.
Although the title track is very good, it's the hypnotic b-side roller Woman Is The Devil that has me dancing all over my kitchen while I make dinner. I could describe the track and tell you why I love it so much, but I'm not into that kind of writing. I think it's completely pointless and I've never gotten anything from writers who go into the structure of tracks or attempt to describe sounds. The only thing that matters to me is actually hearing the track. Woman Is The Devil is so good I only need to ask you one question: Do you like dance music? If you answered "yes" and you claim to be a dj of some kind then you need this record. You can mix it with house. You can mix it with techno. You can mix it with deep dub shit.

Solemn Days [Deconstruct 02] is also amazing. Buy it immediately. The Deconstruct releases--at present there's only two of them--are getting increasingly difficult to find, so good luck getting each for less than $20.

Want more great Records from Levon Vincent? Check out Novel Sound (featuring solid contributions from Jus Ed as well). And again, good luck. Six Figures [Novel Sound 02] is way the fuck sold out.

Moved In

2009-10-10T21:30:00.005-05:00

Preparing studio space. Going to finally set up my decks tonight. But I can't play records 'cause I have people living above. Damn. That was the one nice thing about my last apartment; I was the only tenant in the building and I was very loud.

Anyways. Writing to tell you there's a brand new / sealed copy of Animal Collective's Feels on Amazon dot com right now for $40 and you should totally buy it. That's a fair price for this record, used, and a darn good price for a brand new copy.

I'll be back soon with some real information about new record releases.

Stay deep.

West

2009-09-22T02:03:00.001-05:00

Overwhelmed.
Need to find solid ground.
Will write more when things make sense again.

Audi 5000

2009-09-02T23:04:00.004-05:00

I knew I absolutely had to get out as soon as possible after we went to see Mountains.
"They already played."
What? It's barely after nine.
"Yeah, they played first."

Mountains played first. Before 9pm.
Fuck this.

I'm out of here.

Peace.

Too Short

2009-08-18T03:11:00.003-05:00

Re: Hu - Ton.

Four minutes and thirty fucking seconds?
Are you fucking kidding me?
This beautiful thing should be at least seven minutes.
Fuck.

Late Bloomer

2009-07-30T03:03:00.006-05:00

I don't buy many records that could be classified as progressive house or trance. So when I do buy such a record, you know its shit has got to smell like roses.
David Garcet's Ero smells like a full blooming garden. This track is absolutely sublime. It shines. Very similar in production style to The Field but with more sex.

Gowhere

2009-07-13T19:31:00.007-05:00

Two of my friends died this week.
One drove off an exit ramp and hit a utility pole.
The other--consumed with grief and negative emotions stemming from our friend's death--shot himself in the head last night.

The news is full of violence.
I want to leave.

...

let's go to Pluto the atmosphere's clear
we'll be really cool there with nothing to fear
let's go to Pluto it's cold and it's damp
where children are heroes death is high camp

I want to see Pluto I want to have fun
I want to turn blue under an alien sun
oh let me see Pluto it seems such a gas
with oceans of methane and petrified grass

let's go to Pluto
lets live on the dot
see the bad moon rising
in a lunacy knot

come on let's do Pluto it's really not far
an unleaded dream drive to the prettiest star
I want to see Pluto but maybe I'll wait
til the world turns to meet its plutonium fate
the days will be long here the years will be more
let's go to Pluto like we did before

let's go to Pluto
let's live on the dot
see the bad moon rising
in a lunacy knot

...
The Creatures - Pluto Drive

Final Days Of Loneliness

2009-07-04T13:46:00.006-05:00

Are these the last days because I'm suddenly going to have friends and feel loved?
Or because I'm not going to exist any longer?

...

but there is genius in their hatred
there is enough genius in their hatred to kill you
to kill anybody
not wanting solitude
not understanding solitude
they will attempt to destroy anything
that differs from their own
not being able to create art
they will not understand art
they will consider their failure as creators
only as a failure of the world
not being able to love fully
they will believe your love incomplete
and then they will hate you
and their hatred will be perfect

...
exc. from Charles Bukowski's The Genius Of The Crowd

Sad News

2009-06-24T20:29:00.003-05:00

I received news today that Andy Hughes passed away this month.
He was a collaborator with the Orb, involved in mixing and engineering albums like Live 93, Pomme Fritz, and Orbus Terrarum.

He will be missed.

Vinyl Wins Again

2009-06-22T10:06:00.003-05:00

Excerpts from The Care and Handling of Recorded Sound Materials

Vinyl discs

Vinyl discs are adversely affected by ultraviolet light and thermal cycling (heat fluctuation). The consequence of thermal cycling is that each cycle of temperature results in a small irreversible deformation, and these deformations are cumulative. Vinyl discs are resistant to fungal growth and are unaffected by high humidity levels.

CDs

The compact disc is a laminate of 4 different materials. The bottom of the disc is made of polycarbonate onto which the pits containing the digitized sound information are stamped. A thin layer of aluminum is then applied, covering the pits. A thin lacquer coating (which becomes the top of the disc) is then applied to cover the aluminum layer, and finally the ink for the labeling.

As with any laminated products, one must wonder how the aging characteristics of each material will interact with, and affect adjacent layers.

..............................

Thus far, vinyl has proven to be the most stable of the materials that have been used in the manufacture of sound recordings. However, although stable, its life is not indefinite. Pickett and Lemcoe, in Preservation and Storage of Sound Recordings, states that "failure by chemical degradation of a vinyl disc in ordinary library environments should not occur in less than a century".

..............................

by Gilles St‑Laurent - Music Division - National Library Of Canada

A Fellow

2009-06-20T04:25:00.005-05:00

I recently sent a message to Mountain People because I noticed that Butch - Muskatnuss samples from Mountain 003. Not just a sound but an entire loop. A really obvious one. It's the raw, incredible groove that runs through the entirity of Mountain 003.

-------------------------------------------------------------

From: [Me]
To: mountain people
Date: Jun 17, 2009 11:40 PM
Subject: you're probably already aware of this, but...

(url to track)

I normally don't care about 'appropriation' like this.
But Mountain 003 is one of my favorite records. EVER.
Did you get any credit for this?
Money?
Fillet Mignon?
A high-five?

~ Love

-------------------------------------------------------------

Then this conversation took place :
(url to blog no longer exists. It was basically an e-mail conversation between MP and Butch, wherein the latter denies using the sample then admits he may have forgotten to remove it before finishing the track.)

-------------------------------------------------------------

I hadn't intended to start any kind of dispute. And I really don't know what is being said because I can't read German. But, I have to be honest, something about this kind of appropriation just rubs me the wrong way.
An artist like Girl Talk doesn't bother me; he samples popular music and runs the sample for 4-16 bars, creating new compositions from several sources. It's like hyper sampling. It's smart. It's Steinski.

But Butch uses the Mountain 003 sample(s) throughout Muskatnuss because those samples are the bulk of the track. Take out the MP samples, and what's left? Some unneccessary textures and extra sounds?

I love Mountain 003 because of its simplicity, its deadly beatcentric accuracy. This track cannot be improved. You can't improve upon perfection.
So why try and then pass it off as an original production...?

Intro That

2009-06-19T02:54:00.003-05:00

He wanted respect but he found fear.
He wanted wealth but he found envy.
He wanted love and he found himself.

Quitters Never Win

2009-06-15T15:58:00.003-05:00

Where did dancerecords.com go...?
I'm not terribly upset since they stopped stocking new vinyl, but I did have $200+ in my cart. Older, discounted records that I wanted to buy.

Dumb.

Woman Is The Devil

2009-05-22T19:33:00.002-05:00

(Since Discogs won't allow me to write two-word reviews...)

Instant classic.

Sucka MCs

2009-05-18T04:13:00.006-05:00

I made a recent mass record purchase on Ebay. I've gotten burned on these transactions before by irresponsible record sellers like Aaron Perkins. (This swell guy doesn't even bother to visually grade his records. He graded several records as 'Near Mint' that had deep, obvious gouges on them. Yes, they skipped. A lot.) But I couldn't pass up this opportunity. Besides, what would I lose more sleep over :
Another possibly negligent transaction by a dickhead Ebay seller...
Adding another hundo to my credit card debt...
Or not getting those Robert Hood records for less than the cost of new records...?
Exactly.
'Hoodlum' 2x12" for $2.99!?! Missing that would have been cause for a wrist-slitting party.

Tha Purchase :

Detroit Grand Pu Bahs 'Sandwiches' $3.76
G-Man 'IV' $2.99
Monolake 'Tangent' $5.59
Pelon 'No Stunts' white label $8.99
Porter Ricks 'Vol 2' $8.49
Pub 'Summer PT2' $7.00
Rhythm & Sound w/ Tikiman 'Music A Fe Rule' $4.45
Robert Hood 'Hoodlum' 2x12" $2.99
Robert Hood 'Internal Empire' 2x12" $20.50
Robert Hood 'Moveable Parts Chapter 1' $8.40
Robert Hood 'The Pace' $8.00
Robert Hood 'The Protein Valve' $3.25
Robert Hood (Floorplan) 'Envy' $4.25
Speedy J 'Public Energy No. 1' 2x12" white label $3.25
Thomas Brinkmann 'Axel/Bernd' $4.25
V/A 'Loops' Serotonin Loop Comp $3.25
V/A 'Techno-1' Detroit KMS Comp $5.59Pretty fucking respectable.

THANK YOU digital djs for selling your records. You may be stinking up the new vinyl market (at least in USia) but your generous contributions of some old gems back into the used record pool is greatly appreciated. I've been buying a lot of sweet techno lately for less than it would cost at Beatport for the 'virtual' tracks.

On the other hand, since your Love doesn't eat you from the inside out as it does me, you don't have to deal with issues like, "Oh shit, 'Internal Empire' skips since it's scratched and I'll have to negotiate some kind of refund, possibly wasting time/energy/money to return it."
This is where your insensitivity, your lack of complete commitment pays off, digital djs.
Lucky for you, ignorance is bliss.

Stephan Motherfucking Laubner

2009-05-17T01:25:00.004-05:00

All of his STL releases are either on my shelves or in my wantlist.
Perlon -> his own Something label -> the latest on Smallville Silent State...all strong releases. Most are goddamn incredible.

You're going to feel like a poor bastard later if you don't buy his records now, like how you feel when you look for Moodymann and Theo Parrish records that didn't get pressed or repressed enough to meet demand.

...

2009-05-15T03:11:00.000-05:00

Love is not a business.

Perfectly Articulated

2009-05-12T03:37:00.005-05:00

Shawn Rudiman - Rubin's Place...
[Technoir Audio : TNA-001]
This came out in 2003. I discovered this gem last year in 2008. Even my ears can't be everywhere at once :(
While the entire release is solid--"Martini Kiss" and "Solitude 1" are straight-up Rudiman loves Detroit techno and "Shakedown" is a funky-good broken beat jam--"Rainy Days And Nights" steals the show. Soulful and sincere, "Rainy Days..." is the kind of track I wish I could make after collapsing to the floor, screaming until I lose my voice, then getting back up, wondering, "Why didn't the universe burst into flames by the sheer force of my will?"
Nice one, Shawn.

Almost Forgot

2009-05-11T05:46:00.000-05:00

Oh...
And Levon Vincent too!

Your Scent

2009-05-10T01:51:00.002-05:00

I've listened to Butane's "Inferno Jack" about fifteen times in the last three days.
A fact which probably says just as much about me as it does about this track.

We're All Fucked! (Not Really)

2009-04-29T20:59:00.007-05:00

Swine Flu. (Not caused by eating pork.) Daily suicide bombings. Large chunks of ice, the size of Rhode Island, break off Antarctic Shelf. (Still think global warming isn't real? C'mon meow.)
Oh, and there's this whole recession thing too.
Yeah. Kinda sucks. And not in that "oh god yes that feels fucking great" kind-of-way.

Escape!
Drug and alcohol sales are at all-time highs. Why pay off .02% of your credit card debt when you can use that money to instead buy a gram, a quarter, a few pills, or that bottle on the top shelf? If you feel like shit today, you're probably going to feel like shit tomorrow. Might as well feel like a rockstar for a few hours now while you can. Fuck it. You may not have a home next month. You may apply to work at McDonalds and be turned away because they're already flooded with applications. Worse, you may even get that fucking job.

The world is in upheaval and amidst the shit music being pumped out of bloated udders, there is still that small trickle of genius. Tracks being made by the real heads. The hungry. The ones who want it so bad they would probably die (or kill themselves) if they had their sampler/laptop/Machinedrum repossessed. Because these artists are the possessed.

Keepin' it real:
Wireman
Atheus
Kris Wadsworth
Tin Man

(No need to mention MLZ, Portable, Redshape, T++, Newworldaquarium, Andy Stott, Omar-S, Mike Huckaby, Luke Hess, Shed, Quantec, Let's Go Outside, Claro Intelecto, Schatrax, Bvdub, or Marko Furstenberg because you already know about these guys and buy their records, right? RIGHT...???)

Escape with music.

Universal Language

2009-04-12T19:07:00.003-05:00

I brought my Korg ES-1 to Easter lunch today. The younger people were keenly interested in it.
I had to leave it in the car at first because my mom doesn't understand.
Music is an ice breaker.

The Choice is Yours

2009-03-12T06:39:00.003-05:00

I don't really have much of a choice anymore. If I want to make a livable income someday I have to do it through music. Go ahead and laugh. I know underground dance music producers and djs don't make shit. But they can.

I look at it like this:
What am I more likely to do...?
Meet all the qualifications for some job at Sony Pictures, authoring dvds...
Or release some records and get paid to play music?

It has to be the latter. I've spent all my 20s buying and learning dance music. My stacks are deep deep deep now. Unlike my peers, who were busy getting "job experience" I educated myself on the history of dance music. I went to a Chicago warehouse party and all the North American techno festivals that matter. I went to a shitty rave in the basement of a church and had a great time; I wasn't even rolling.

I don't have a choice because I already made my choice. I probably made my choice when I was nine, taping songs from my clock radio into the crappy built-in mic of my boombox because I wanted compilations of my favorite songs. Luckily, there were good radio stations in Baltimore. I was soaking in the rays of Orb's "Perpetual Dawn", enjoying the fresh beats of Black Sheep, moving in new ways to a continuous mix of alien-futurist-machine-music called "techno" on Saturday nights, giggling to Doctor Demento on Sunday nights, and digging the fact that there was a dj personality who referred to himself as "Zoltar, brotha from another planet". No joke. That dj was a fucking badass.

I've given so much of my life to music that I've become useless in other areas where I actually had some skill. And you know what? I don't care. I don't care because I was tired of being that 'jack of all trades and master of none'. That was aimless and getting me nowhere. Am I somewhere now? I don't know. Maybe I am. And maybe I'm heading to an even better place. What I do know is that I've become a lethal record buyer, and I have one of the best techno/house collections in the Midwest. The only djs who can compete with my collection are already well-known. Like I'm sure Daniel Bell, Kevin Saunderson, Jeff Mills, Carl Craig, Kenny Dixon Jr., and Derrick Carter have incredible collections. Anyone else who isn't a well-known professional, good luck. You won't beat what I have. Maybe your house selection will edge out my house selection. Maybe you have more boring drum'n'bass records. Maybe you paid way too much for some Italo Disco 'gems'. But overall, looking at the entirity of the collection, you can't fucking touch this. You can't beat what I have because you don't devote your entire life to digging for techno, and if you do, please get in touch with me because I'd love to meet you. Dabble after work? Laptop dj on the weekends? Fuck you. I only want to know my equals. I want the hardest of the hardcore. You have to eat, sleep, fuck, and shit dance music to step up to my plate.
Bitch.

KDJ 20

2009-03-09T15:14:00.002-05:00

Sometimes it's real fucking funny what sellers write in their discogs seller comments. To sell his copy of Andrés - Untitled [KDJ 20] seller housemusicandhockeydontmix wrote: "This is andres best by far. don't think it isn't."
Well, actually, no it isn't his "best by far". That's a ridiculous exaggeration considering DJ Dez's entire output via his Andrés alias is solid. And besides, no track on KDJ 20 is better than "Trues" [KDJ 13]. "Trues" is an absolutely astounding track and (don't get me wrong) KDJ 20 is a healthy slab of Detroit glorification but it doesn't top "Trues". No way. Forget the market prices; that's a matter of supply versus demand. You want a soulful, deep house bargain? Buy KDJ 13.
Oh, and housemusicandhockeydontmix's seller feedback is awful. How can you trust his opinion?

Seduce Me

2009-02-18T00:23:00.003-06:00

I'll never be able to see something exactly how someone else sees it. I'll never be able to fully comprehend another person's perspective. That's just how it is. I'm me. You're you. We live in different worlds and they may overlap in some ways but they cannot be the same world unless we are the same person. Which we aren't.

Films, however, can establish a temporary perspective that verges on seeing through another person's eyes. This accomplishment by films--even by some that are terrible--gives me a high regard for the medium; I believe filmmaking is the greatest of all arts.
Tonight I saw Coraline, an enchanting film by Henry Selick, the madman responsible for A Nightmare Before Christmas. The film was excellent and the viewing with special 3D glasses made the illusion of altered perspective more successful than most other films.

Good films, like good lovers, are seductive because they draw you in. They make you forget about everything else for a while by temporarily changing your perspective. I suppose, living like I do (in a cave), I often substitute films for the company of women. Everyone wants to be seduced. Everyone wants to forget who he/she is for a while. Unfortunately, a film only lasts a couple hours and I'm quickly thrown back into my reality: Lonely. Uncertain. Drifting.

Oh. And about the first thing I said...Someday some genius will invent that SQUID device from Strange Days and then I'll be wrong since that fucker taps into your cerebral cortex and you can experience another person's reality via ALL of your senses. Since our senses link us to the physical world, you'd literally feel like you were in the shoes of another human being. So what's left to differentiate realities then? Our souls?

BAM!

2009-01-13T01:00:00.000-06:00

Hatikvah - Love Bells (KW's Detroit Sleaze Remix)
[Morris Audio Citysport Edition]

Let Go

2008-12-04T20:14:00.004-06:00

I'm a perfectionist. Some people would say I'm "anal retentive". This may have been true ten years ago, but now "anal" would refer more to my fetish than my personality.

I like to be precise. I like to be correct. Which means I also like to know when I am wrong (so that I can come correct). I like it when other people have their shit together so they don't waste my time. I don't think there's anything wrong with this. But it can be taken too far. As a child and young adult I was fairly uptight in general. Not good. I was stressed out too often, a replicant heading for early "retirement".

Now I'm just uptight about certain things. Like the condition grading accuracy of vinyl records I buy from online sellers. For example, a lot of sellers automatically grade new records as 'mint' but they really aren't. In fact, most new records are not 'mint'. Sleeve scuffs? Not 'mint', jackass. Played in-store? Definitely not 'mint', fucker. Probably not even 'near mint'.

Either :
* Take the time to look at your records under a GOOD light at various angles. Even your "new" records. Test the record's playing condition if any wear is visible.
OR
* If you don't want to take the time to grade your records accurately, then don't act like a fucking saint when I or any other buyer asks for a partial or full refund. If you want to save time/money upfront, then be prepared to pay for it later. No one is perfect. (Especially not me.) And vinyl is an extremely imperfect media. Acknowledge this and take some accountability. Be a professional. Don't be a dicksqueeze.

Of course, there are very few sellers who can always meet my expectations. So I have lowered my expectations. In fact, buying vinyl records has taught me to just let some things slide. How many times am I going to allow myself to get upset about a brand new record that has a bit too much surface noise or is slightly warped and doesn't grip the slipmat as well as I'd like it to before these worries send me over the edge permanently? Fuck that.

I want to let go. I'll never let go of it all. But I can always try.
Who wants to hold onto shit?
That doesn't feel good.
"Retentive" my ass.

ANNOYING AND WORTH TAKING A COUPLE MINUTES TO SHARE WITH THE GROUP

2008-11-24T17:44:00.002-06:00

On 11/24/08, 04:35AM, tamara1001s wrote:

Hello, Am using this opportunity to purchased item from you but i have a freight shipping company that will come for the pickup of the item by answer my question below: Q 1: How long you have been owned the item you are willing to sell for me Q 2: Hope the item still available for sale with good condition state . Q 3: What is the final asking price you are willing to sell the item for me Q 4: Let me have attach of the picture of the item you want to sell for me Q 5: Do you able to accept cashier check or Personal check as a mode of the payment. Q 6: Will you be available when the shipping company will Be coming for the pickup? Q 7: Can we trust you on this transaction? Q 8: Can you send me your full contact information such as: Name: Address: City: State: Zip Code: Country: Regards.

sent to tamara1001s on 24-Nov-08 03:42 PM

GO FUCK YOURSELF, YOU STUPID, SCAMMING WHORE.
DISCOGS SELLERS DO NOT TOLERATE THIS KIND OF CONDUCT.
GO BACK TO FOOLING IDIOT EBAY SELLERS.

LOVE,

YOUR LORD AND MASTER

I'm Only Stubborn Because I Love So Much

2008-11-02T17:08:00.004-06:00

Dance Records dot com is no longer stocking new vinyl. They haven't been for the last four months. This means that resource is now gone, and I'm left with only Forced Exposure to get records domestically. But they don't keep up too well with a LOT of the latest and greatest techno releases, so I'm stuck with having to pay a shit ton for shipping charges to get imports from Juno, UK.

Most of the records I want are pressed in Germany. Most (but certainly not all) of the labels releasing the best techno are based there. Germany isn't stealing our artists. We're giving them away. There aren't enough opportunities here for upcoming artists to make an income from producing and dj'ing. So they move to Berlin. It's an inevitable decision for many U.S. techno artists. It's a trend.

If I could reduce my record collection drastically, how the hell am I supposed to move a couple thousand records overseas? I don't have the money for that. I have negative money.
And even if I did want to digitize all this vinyl and pretend I'm playing records with Serato--which I definitely don't want to do--the time and storage demands would be overwhelming. Yes, reduction of arms and elimination of the weaker records is possible, but that shit takes time. Time is money. And I don't have much of either.
Who does?

Detroit pioneers like Kevin Saunderson and Carl Craig have money. They can do what they want. They don't have to move to Berlin to survive. They get paid to fly there. What do you think they get paid for one gig after expenses? No less than five grand, I'm positive. And I've heard plenty of rumors that they often get ten grand or more. Being a (famous) dj can be great because you don't have to split that money with four other band members that annoy you, restrict your creativity, and give you herpes.

After spending a couple thousand dollars buying records from Dance Records in less than two years, they are cutting me off. I sent them an e-mail asking about the vinyl situation, and they didn't even bother to respond. Their customer service has been great. And now they're too embarrassed to respond to one of their best customer's inqueries.
They could have at least said, "Sorry, bro. Vinyl market in the U.S. is dead and we don't care enough to just sell a couple hundred records every week. You should move to Berlin."

Fuck you.

How is This Possible?

2008-11-02T05:48:00.002-06:00

I did not buy any records last month. Not a single record throughout the entire month of October.

Which means I'll have to buy plenty this month.
Or not.

Resentment is a Bitch

2008-10-04T07:58:00.006-05:00

I'm undergoing post-techno depression. This happens every time I return from one of those big electronic music festivals. This time it was Decibel in Seattle. Good times were had by all.

I do have some festival regrets, however. Like I didn't get to see any of the Opticals. Okay, so most of the performances didn't get rave reviews, but I would have liked to see some of them anyway. My absence from said Opticals was mostly due to the unfortunate overlapping of events. It makes me appreciate the Mutek method of scheduling the Nocturnes after the A/Visions are completely finished. This kind of programming basically says, "We will schedule events with enough time in between to catch a disco nap or grab some food and you won't have to miss anything because every artist we book is awesome and you don't want to miss a single minute." I prefer this approach. It's very confident. Like a great dj who knows that she/he can pull any record from that case and it's going to be killer. At Mutek, I got to see Biosphere perform live with mind-altering visuals and then hop, skip, and jump over to catch Polmo Polpo playing his euphoric nautical beats with those haunting slide guitar melodies.

Also, I missed seeing Stewart Walker perform live, which really pissed me off and was totally not my fault. I wanted to go earlier (before it was impossible to get in, regardless of any pass), but my twin soul forced me to wait for her. I still don't understand this one. I stated without any vagueness, "If I miss Steward Walker I'm going to regret it and I'll resent you." Was she trying to make me cry? Seriously. This loss will never be forgotten. What's worse, Madame Soulmate forced me to leave early before the festival was over. For no good reason other than...she had to leave early? Fuck if I know. I had to leave my front row seat at the Ambient Showcase to catch a bus to the airport. I missed the final performances as well as the Decibel afterhours. For no good reason. Again...resentment. I suppose I'll have to let go of this irritation eventually. That would be the healthy thing to do, after all. But for now, I'm a bit raw from being rubbed the wrong way.

By the way, I'm on a new program where I'm limiting the number of records I buy every month. Upon returning from Decibel, I stuck a post-it note to my computer:

October
Records
(Limit 20)

Elitist Techno Honky Buys More Records

2008-08-21T22:47:00.004-05:00

I got my order from Zion's Gate the other day :

Random Logic - Numrebs EP (Tehnika) (12") 4.99
Premature Wig - Endless Dub (Skor Records) (12") 6.99
Flow.Machine - Class Of '96 (10") 4.99
Robi Uppin - Fade (12") 9.99
Paul Mac - Push Came To Shove (2xLP) 8.99
Soultek - Paradigm (12") 11.99 11.99
Polycubist - Echo Life (Skor Records) (12") 6.00
Sven Väth - Strahlemann Und Söhne (Rmx) (Virgin 9.99
Murcof Utopia Remixes 9.99
Subtotal: 73.92

All good stuff. A few gems. Note Robi Uppin's "Fade" on Driftwood, a label that didn't last long enough to completely satisfy The Lovers. Oh well. Perhaps greatness should take a bow before any hint of weakness surfaces.

If you have questions about any of these releases, hit me up. They're all incredible. Except maybe the "Strahlemann Und Söhne" twelve. I only got it for the Soul Capsule remix, which has this really strange, haunting sound on it. (I like strange. And I like haunting.) Soul Capsule is Thomas Melchior ("Productions") and Peter ("Baby Ford") Adshead. This is straight up Perlon-related goodness.

Also, if you're very familiar with Tehnika, Flow.Machine (Thor of "Aliens Don't Boogie" fame), or Skor Records, give yourself a big fucking pat on the back. You're elite.

'Fuck Ya'll Lookin' At?!?

2008-08-18T00:13:00.004-05:00

I've been bad about keeping up with this blog thing that I started.
Oh. Fucking. Well.

I saw Tropic Thunder today. I was laughing so hard tears rolled down my cheeks. And that was before the actual film even started. You'll know what I'm talking about if you see it.

Latest order with juno.uk :
FREUND DER FAMILIE Konig Der Welt EP 12"
PROMPT Evolve 12"
PROMPT Elephant 12"
PROMPT Toucan 12"

Prompt, much?
Again, the shipping charges fucking killed me. I hate having to order from overseas. But who the fuck has these records in the U.S? Anyone...Hello...?

My credit card debt has passed the $15,000 mark. If I were to buy absolutely nothing throughout the next year, not even gas or pay my rent, I still wouldn't be able to pay this off entirely. Is everyone in debt a slave? Or can we dictate our freedom regardless of what we owe? Money certainly gives one more options. Like I can't just get on a plane and fly to Berlin. Well. Actually. I could. I'd pay for it with one of my credit cards, like everything else I buy. Credit limit exceeded? No problem. Get a new card.

Selector Selectivity

2008-07-11T17:50:00.008-05:00

I'm buying fewer records now, which is good. But overall, each record is costing me more. (Which is bad.) I just got this order in the mail from juno.uk :

CHEVY/LEMOS: Woman's Key (Be Chosen Germany)
MOUNTAIN PEOPLE: Mountain 005 (Mountain People Germany)
KOI: Deaf Torero (Styrax Leaves Germany)
CARL, Aaron: Crucified (Millions Of Moments Germany)
NUBIAN MINDZ: Afrika Man (Delsin Holland)
BOLIVAR, Pablo: Gold Series (D Press Industries Spain)
WLADIMIR M: As The Leaves Fall From The Trees (reissue) (Eevo Lute Holland)
FREUND DER FAMILIE: Sark EP (Freund Der Familie Germany)
SLICES: Slices: The Electronic Music Magazine Issue 2-08
Subtotal $93.14
Insurance $1.20
Shipping $39.06
GRAND TOTAL $133.40

And, as usual, I'm very upset that I have to buy these records from over-fucking-seas. I should be able to get all these from a U.S. Internet retailer. Note that the shipping and insurance accounts for more than 30% of the entire cost of the order. (Plus Paypal and credit card companies charge additional fees for foreign currency transactions.)

These ridiculous costs aren't helping me reduce my credit card debt. But GODDAMN HAVE YOU HEARD THESE RECORDS?!? If not, you better git on like you been shit on. All these are essential listening. And if you actually buy music, they are essential purchases as well. "Why?" you may or may not have asked.
Well...

The Chevy and Lemos collaboration is just damn solid and a standout among those hundreds of sound-the-same samples I listen to every week, via the weekly new release e-mail I get from juno.uk.

Mountain People deliver yet again. Mountain People "003" is one of my favorite records. Ever. and "005" is damn good as well.

Koi. On Styrax Leaves. If you need further explanation, research the label immediately. Wait another minute and you'll miss yet another limited sick/deep/gorgeous-as-fuck techno release. Don't like it? No problem. Wait a few months and you'll be able to sell it for double what you paid.

Aaron Carl's "Crucified" gets the re-release treatment but this time it's accompanied by remixes from Quantec and Rod Modell. Thank god. And it comes on pink vinyl too!

I had to listen to the Nubian Mindz record a few times. I've been buying fewer records like this lately, but "Techno Love" is straight-up Underground Resistance-influenced shit. All the releases on Delsin are very Detroit. Which is a good thing; Delsin is a pretty consistent label.

Pablo Bolivar. If you aren't familiar with his output (including Pulshar), then please make the acquaintance. In no time you'll be cozying up next to this 12" with the dubby Beat Pharmacy (Brendon Moeller/Echologist) remixes. Very very good stuff here. VERY GOOD.

"As The Leaves Fall From The Trees" is a repress from the legendary Eevo Lute label. I wonder if this repress is going to piss off all the people who paid $75+ for this record. Yeah, well, I just got mine for $15, bitches. (And apparently this is remastered as well :)

And lastly, The Freund Der Familie label is definitely one to watch. These releases are extremely limited, so WAKE UP AND HEAR THE FUTURE OF TECHNO! Don't sleep on this shit.

Sure, there's a lot of kids out there copying the formulas and following the "minimal" trend down to its boring template. But it's okay, guys. Techno innovates. Always. As soon as you start to feel that tinge of jade coming on, just know that there is something out there, right now, that will blow your fucking mind. You only need to make it a full-time job, wading through all the filler crap music, to find it.

Or you can just read my blog.

DETROIT ELECTRONIC MUSIC FESTIVAL 2008

2008-06-12T00:38:00.004-05:00

Movement: DEMF 2008? Awesome.
For all the haters who said this festival was better 5 years ago or whatever: You're probably right, you bastards.
Whatever. Nothing is perfect.
Nevertheless, spending a few days in the hollowed downtown of Detroit--the city which inspired some talented and ambitious black kids from the suburbs to create a hybrid of Chicago house and Kraftwerk--is about as close to a 'perfect' vacation as I can possibly experience.

Did some things really suck? Fuck yeah. Here's a list :

Jimmy John's didn't accept my 'Free Sub' coupon.
Police-cops enforced U.S. narcotics laws. (Always bullshit.) I can't believe people still get arrested for smoking grass. Are you kidding me? That's way less dangerous than that drunken idiot over there...
The M_nus Records afterhours ticket was nearly as expensive as the DEMF Weekend Pass. Yes, Hawtin's set was reliably good, but he sounded just like he did last time I saw him. I don't plan on going to the M_nus afterhours next year; these days I need to hear djs who take more risks musically instead of obsessing over new technologies that don't enhance the audience's exprience. And I want to hear djs who play real vinyl records. You know: environmentally-unfriendly plastic discs that have energy and some surface noise. (Personality goes a long way with me.)
I bought a crap dime bag. Joe Drug Dealer's blunt was great, but he pulled the ol' let-him-smoke-my-personal-stash-so-i-can-sell-him-the-shit trick on me. Asshole. And yeah, I know it's my fault for buying drugs from a stranger at a fucking techno festival, okay? I know.
The Beretta Grey afterhours party...Fuck, where do I begin...? First, we get there at least a half hour before 1 a.m. (at which point the price of entry is only $5.) However, the line isn't moving at all. Not a fucking inch. Then, magically, as 1 a.m. comes around, Mr. Venue Employee comes out to inform everyone in line that the entry price has gone up from $5 to $15. And...oh look! The line suddenly starts to advance and it takes us less than five fucking minutes to get inside and give them ten extra dollars. The RIGHT (ie: ethical) way to have done this would have been to cut the line at 1 a.m. Everyone already waiting in line pays $5. Everyone thereafter pays $15. Beretta Grey: You owe me ten bucks. Wait, I'm not done yet. Then after being inside for a while, enjoying the kids playing their laptops in the backroom, digitally train-wrecking a couple times, I make my way back to the front room to see the man who brought me to that afterhours: MARKO FUCKING FURSTENBERG. Amazingly talented artist. But the sound system kept cutting out. $15 cover. Waiting until 4 a.m. for my man. And the bulk of the sound system isn't even working for more than half his set. Un-fucking-believable. But did I throw a tantrum and bitch? Hell no. I stood right in front of him and listened to his magic through the monitors he was using. That's how fucking hardcore I am. (I know it's not cool to call oneself "hardcore" but if you know me you'd understand. You would understand that you are so much less hardcore than I am.)
I dropped $30 on the ground. Probably lost it to one of those beast girls. Ouch! Thirty bucks is 6 used records, 4 new domestic records, or 2 import records from Juno.uk. AND I FUCKING LOST MY GODDAMN FESTIVAL T-SHIRT THAT I PAID FOR. FUCK !!!!!!!!!!!!
DEMF is getting LESS Detroit every year. Other than Carl Craig on the main stage, there wasn't any real focus given to Detroit artists.

But there was great stuff too:

The Real Detroit stage was incredible. And given the acoustic space--all concrete walls, floor, and ceiling (highway overhead)--it was the best sound system. It was right next to the bathroom, and every time I went to take a piss or fill my water bottle, I was drawn to the Detroit sound. Didn't matter if it was bangin' techno, ghetto tech, or soulful house, all of it sounded so fucking good in that space. Hey, all of you who didn't bother to go down into that concrete pit and experience real Detroit: You done fucked up! Big time. It wouldn't have hurt you to pry yourself away from the Beatport stage for a half hour to broaden your funk a bit more.
Deepchord Live. Sure they played at like 4 p.m. and there were only a few heads there. But dealer got me high and deep dub paradise was afternoon delight.

p.s. ~ I can hardly wait to be as rich and famous as that Dubfire guy (from Deepdish) so that I too can have pretentious publicity photos taken of me. No really. I'm not kidding. (Seriously. No joke. I REALLY want pretentious publicity photos of me looking like this whole 'techno thing' is very serious. I'm serious!!! Can you not see how serious I am?) Eh. Won't happen anyway. I can't contrive accessibility. Love cannot be manufactured.

I Rock Techno

2008-06-11T23:12:00.003-05:00

Forced Exposure still hasn't stocked Mathew Jonson's "Symphony for the Apocalypse" so i gave in, paid the couple extra bucks, and got it from dancerecords dot com instead. I played it three times already tonight. I wish the middle section didn't get so "Return of the Zombie Bikers" but it's still an excellent track. I mentioned this in a previous post, after listening to the mpfree, but now that I own the vinyl I'm very satisfied. Sounds so much better.

I recently set aside some time to throw a mix together. I don't plan this shit. I basically pick out the first couple tracks, the last track, and then improvise everything in between. I don't like mixes that sound too planned and perfect, like they're mixed by a robot playing Ableton Live. I could give you some examples here, but I can't afford to piss anyone off yet. Not until I'm famous. Then I'll feel very free to call out all the toy djs. (And there's A LOT of them.)

Anyway, my recent mix features "Symphony for the Apocalypse" along with a couple handfuls of more dope tracks that you need to buy if you don't already own them.

Download here :
http://www.stephenganser.com/discjockey/discjockey.html

P's And Q's

2008-05-16T02:34:00.002-05:00

So I just watched that "trailer" for this year's Movement 2008 / DEMF (Detroit Electronic Musical Festival) . In case you didn't know--I'm hoping you did know, but if you didn't--that track is "Music People" by the estimable Kenny Dixon Jr., aka Moodymann. If you want to get this track on vinyl (and you SHOULD because your life will better for owning this) you have a few options:

The best option is to get the full 9+plus-minute version on Silentintroduction. But if you aren't willing to pay the $50 - $80 that this album may cost, you can get a shorter version via the "I Can't Kick This Feeling When It Hits" twelve-inch, available in several pressings, some with 2 tracks and others with 4 tracks. A 4 track version will be much harder to find. As far as I know, none of these 12" versions have the full-length "Music People" that is available on Silentintroduction. If any of them do, please let me know. I'd be very interested in knowing which one.

The last option to acquire "Music People" is to get the The Silence Is Broken bootleg. However, unless you're a die-hard, slitting your wrists completest for 3 Chairs Detroit House, I wouldn't recommend buying this. Sure it has tracks that you will never find on vinyl. And there's some tracks for which you would have to shell out a couple c-notes to acquire the original pressings. And that's all cool and everything. BUT HOLY SHIT THIS IS THE WORST-PRESSED VINYL EVER. I really think this is my worst-pressed record in my 7500+ collection. It's that bad. So, like I said, unless you're a KDJ mega fan, avoid this one. Oh, and does this crap bootleg have the full-length version of "Music People"? I don't know. I could check. It's sitting about 10 feet away from me on a shelf. I know exactly where it is. But I don't feel like pulling that record right now. It creeps me out.

If I want to hear nearly ten minutes of "Music People" I'd rather just grab my copy of Silentintroduction. I bought it from that piece of shit 'doctorfugazi' seller on Ebay. He's a scumbag. He didn't send my record until after I filed a Paypal complaint, so I got it about 50 days after I paid. Now, okay, I can forgive that kind of negligence. It's stupid, but forgiveable. I'm a very patient person. What WAS NOT forgiveable was that he described the condition as "immaculate" and then delivered a record in 'VG-' condition. What a fucking git. Seriously. Not even 'very good'. No, this was worse. Maybe even 'good+' worse. Anyway, his name is Steven S Grange, and when you see him you can say, "Ohhh... you're that incompetent dicksmack who shouldn't be selling records on ebay."
That's right, fucker.
I'm calling you out, Grange.

Fuck You Rising Petroleum Costs

2008-05-13T00:32:00.003-05:00

Shipping gets more expensive every year. The cost of freight, in general, has a higher rate of inflation than, say, eggs. However, since your eggs need to be shipped (using petroleum) the eggs are also more expensive. So when the cost of petroleum goes up EVERYTHING costs more. That's the law of a petroleum-based economy.

I'm now paying more than fifteen-fucking dollars for each of my import records. It's really pissing me off. I should be able to buy these from a U.S. distributor or retailer. But, as far as I know, there are none. Maybe I can get some of these records from Gramaphone Records (Chicago, IL) for $12 or less, but I wouldn't know because I don't live in a real city like Chicago. (Not yet.)

So here's my over-priced record order from the other day :

FURSTENBERG, Marko Repentance EP ARTLESS 2196 12" $11.60
LEFTOVER Eichenholz EP BAUM 002 12" $9.94
PULSHAR Nospheratu PHONOBOX 005 12" $13.26
KRUTON Nitro Hassle KRUTON 1-sided 12" $11.60

Subtotal $46.40
Shipping $18.72
GRAND TOTAL $65.13

That's an average of $16.28 per record. REE-FUCKING-DICK-U-LOUS.
Okay? This is fucking bullshit. There needs to be just ONE retailer in the U.S. who can work directly with the labels (or a good distributor of prime techno) to get me these records for less.

Why did I pay so much for these records...?
Glad you didn't ask.
Two reasons :
1) I cannot get them from any online U.S. retailer, as I already stated.
2) Have you heard these??? If you have and you can't recognize the genius in these records, then please, stop reading this now. You're a fucking retard, and you don't deserve my golden science.

My People

2008-05-10T19:07:00.002-05:00

"About this time last year, my records were just settling into a new apartment. Well, once again I find myself typing this column surrounded by boxes, milk crates, and Ibuprofen. But it's 2008, baby. Not even the mortgage crisis can stop this techno train from rollin'."
- - from ML Tronik's monthly "Bubble Metropolis" column in XLR8R.

Current listening : Carl Craig's "Sessions". I'd buy the 3xLP unmixed version, but I already own all the best twelves from these two mixes :)

I was thinking about getting "techno" tattooed on my penis. But I don't have any tattoos or piercings. Why start now? Maybe I'll reconsider tattoos when i'm 65 and selling my records for heroin.

Current Plays

2008-04-30T17:14:00.005-05:00

Butane - Becoming is my favorite new techno full length album. Remember, this is from the same genius who graced us with "How Low Can You Go" from his On the Ket twelve-inch, and this new 2x12" on Andrew Rasse's own Alphahouse label is top-shelf material. Immediately upon hearing the first track "Collapse" I knew I was hearing a masterpiece. Now that 99% of new techno releases suck because any jackass with a cracked copy of Ableton Live can make tracks, it's nice to know that I can still depend on artists like Butane to deliver something that's still got some soul, funk, and depth. (See also : related Foundsound Label artists Miskate and Someone Else.)

I just discovered Brommage Dub last month, and I have yet to hear a bad release from this pair (Jean-Louis Huhta and Jesper Dahlbäck). Their last release Carbon Oxide is a perfect record : two tracks, each filling the entire side of the vinyl, and both are undoubtedly playable. Brilliant stuff here. Now that "minimal" techno has become trendy and formulaic (yawn), I look towards artists like Brommage Dub, Rod Modell (Deepchord), Syncom Data, Deadbeat and Pole to bring me the deepness.

Speaking of which, if you can appreciate deep and dubby techno, then go back and pick up any Dean DeCosta or Steve O'sullivan (Bluetrain) record you can get your hands on. There's about a 90% chance you'll get something phenomenal; these guys are very reliable. And what the fuck are they doing now? I don't think either of these gifted producers have released anything new in the last five years. By the way, good luck finding DeCosta's Diminishing Returns! I already bought mine just a few weeks ago from dancerecords.com, and I can't believe you all were sleeping on this for so long. Holy shit I have the rarest luck. If you don't know what I'm talking about and why I nearly crapped myself when I found two brand new copies of this for just $10 apiece, then do some research. Start here : http://www.discogs.com/release/64625

I've been listening to Mathew Jonson's "Symphony" a lot lately. (I wish Forced Exposure would just get this record already so I can buy it.) Atmospheric, haunting melodies. Kinda spacey and a bit psychedelic in a good way, like most of his better productions. No wonder he brought me to tears at DEMF last year.

I Would Hate To Give You The Wrong Impression (I Also Have Pleasant Chats On SoulSeek As Well)

2008-04-27T03:25:00.003-05:00

[me] you have pretty good taste
[me] from what i see, most of these are asd'd...you play them in ableton live?
[me] i mean...you have a marko furstenberg track for fuck's sake.
[me] respect!
(10:25) [5E11] well, just started trying out live recently
[me] wise caucasion, deadbeat, sami koivikko....
[me] seriously.
(10:27) [5E11] yeah, great stuff
(10:28) [5E11] esp. last deadbeat ep "mecca"
[me] i own most of all this shit on vinyl :)
(10:28) [5E11] damn... :-o
[me] it got REALLY bad the last year; i've had to slow down recently
(10:29) [5E11] you mean in the number of records?
[me] yes.
[me] and the money.
[me] and the time.
[me] and the obsessive batman detective work
(10:33) [5E11] haha, yeah too much good stuff out there
[me] no shit. and i got WAY too good at finding it
[me] geez, you even got rick wade
[me] you're not fucking around
(10:38) [5E11] haha, if you like rick wade, you should definately check out his older stuff on labels such as harmonie park and elevate
[me] :)
[me] i already OWN that stuff
(10:39) [5E11] nice!
[me] i got into 3 chairs stuff back in 2000
[me] before the ebay gouging
(10:40) [5E11] those are hard-to-find nowadays
[me] there's some stuff i didn't buy back then....because i didn't want to pay more than $20 for a record...and now i'm kicking myself. a lot of those are worth $50 - $200 now
[me] at least i own theo parrish's (nearly) entire discography
[me] and a most of moodymann/kenny dixon jr
(10:42) [5E11] damn... :-o
[me] lol !
[me] yeah. moving apartments is a real bitch :)
(10:43) [5E11] yeah, I understand now for sure! lol
[me] what about basic channel-inspired deepchord stuff...you dig that too?
(10:45) [5E11] some of it, I like the more dancefloor-orientated stuff they do
[me] okay.
(10:45) [5E11] such as CV313
[me] fuck yeah
(10:45) [5E11] and older basic channel stuff
(10:45) [5E11] phylyps trak, octagon etc.
[me] right
[me] got all those too
[me] do you know : thor - "aliens don't boogie"
(10:46) [5E11] no, thor doesn't ring a bell
[me] dl that track
[me] it's deep as fuck and definitely tips a hat to early basic channel
[me] you want the original. not the "mr. g remix"
(10:47) [5E11] ok
[me] here, i'll give you a couple more you may like and then i gotta go
[me] http://www.discogs.com/release/973357 (the b-side is a killer dub track)
[me] http://www.discogs.com/release/64625 (if you like deep/dubby techno that's definitely danceable, dean decosta is VERY consistent)
[me] oh... and most people wouldn't dance to this, except for me and a lot of the kids i met at mutek, but this is one of the DEEPEST tracks i've ever heard :
[me] theo parrish - "dance of the drunken drums"
[me] it's what got me hooked on detroit house in 2000. i heard it while i was living in australia. (they only played trance at the raves and it started to really annoy the fuck out of me)
(10:54) [5E11] yeah, I know that track, that's always way to deep
[me] lol
[me] well i love to take "risks" when i dj. so i play stuff like that.
(10:56) [5E11] well one thing for sure: you're not making it easy mixing those tracks
(10:56) [5E11] damn hard to mix imho
[me] i like challenges. i've made it easier by seperating records by tempo, rather than genre.
(11:03) [5E11] ah ok
[me] i hate adhering to any one kind of music. as long as it's in tempo (or you're good at hitting breaks) then it doesn't fucking matter
[me] keeping the beat and the energy going, maintaining a good flow...that's what matters most
(11:05) [5E11] Indeed :-)
[me] well it was cool chatting with someone who knows his shit.
[me] but i gotta go shower and eat now.
(11:07) [5E11] ok, thanks for your suggestions! I'll def. check them out!
[me] cool. i'm outta here. (are you going to DEMF this year...?)
(11:09) [5E11] no I live in Europa, too hard to come over I guess
[me] take care!
(11:09) [5E11] bye!

First Record Order In Ten Days (That's A RECORD In Itself)

2008-04-24T10:29:00.003-05:00

I didn't buy any new records for over a week.
That's really good for me. I had to distract myself with other things. Like actually listening to the hundreds of records I got this last month, instead of listening to new mpfrees to decide what I would like to keep and purchase on vinyl.
Then I placed an order a couple days ago.

Here was what I purchased :

Michoacan - "Amorelectrico" [Loqo] 1@$ 6.99

Black Mustang & Kerrier District, Remix By Sleeparchive - "Blackout" [Loeb] 2@$ 5.99

Patrick Lindsey - "Kami Kamikaze" [Funkwelle] 1@$ 9.99

Gel Abril, Remixes By Mark Broom, Deetron- "Your Face Is A Mess" [Be As One] 1@$ 9.99

DJ Slugo/DJ Deeon - "Ghetto Classics Volume 2" [Dance Mania Ghetto Classics] 1@$ 8.99

Chris Carrier - "Le Diablo / High Life / An Other Spliff" [Adult Only] 1@$ 9.99

Merchandise Total: $ 57.93

'v999' : You're A Piece Of Shit

2008-04-20T18:07:00.003-05:00

Seriously.
I'm going to continue to expose dicksmacks like 'v999' ruining what was once a really nice community for sharing electronic music. Perhaps, if I have the motivation, I'll even publish a semi-annual 'shit list' of all the asshole SoulSeek users like this one.

--------------------------------------
(17:08) [v999] start me man
[me] do what i say man! (that's you)
(17:09) [v999] what???
[me] you and your imperative statements. that's what.
[me] you order me to do what you want. then you ban me.
--------------------------------------

...What a retard. I had no problem finding the same files from at least five other users who weren't jerks. I have TONS of great stuff 'v999' could certainly benefit from hearing. Rare stuff that very few users are sharing.
His loss.

Hank Williams, I'm A Ramblin' Man

2008-04-19T05:59:00.005-05:00

My girlfriend tells me that I don't understand her. And she doesn't understand me. But this is okay because we love each other.
Hmm.
There was a point in my life; a few years ago, when I had some money saved up. I had a goal. An escape plan. Only a handful of people can appreciate my gifts here, so why continue to waste my energy with a place and a people who don't want me, right? I was going to get out. And then the girl I was in love with told me she didn't love me anymore. (She told me, years later, that she had lied.) And then I lost a large part of my savings buying a laptop on Ebay that never existed. (I had more than $2100 stolen from me. And yes, I hold Ebay accountable for playing "middle man" while not compensating their users when the deal gets fucked by fraudulence.) So I decided I couldn't keep money any more. Money didn't like me. I worked my fucking ass off to get that money. To save money for a laptop, which would have opened up performance opportunities. It was supposed to be like a new chapter in my life or something. But instead I just had my savings stolen and the little money I had left after that, I didn't want that anymore either. So, I spent it all on music. After I add up they money I lost from the roommate who owes me over $1000, the shit dodge shadow I paid way too much for, and then the theft of more than $2100 via Ebay, I just didn't want money anymore. Why should I? The reason I was saving money vanished. And after all that hard work, most of it was taken from me anyway. So what was the point? If I had money, it was eventually stolen from me. I hated money. I loved records. The solution was obvious.

But now I have a goal again. Someplace to go. Something to save money for. Something that really matters. Even more than records. (I know, can you fucking believe it?) And that changes things. I'm just scared of repeating the cycle all over again. This next thing doesn't work out and then... where does that leave me? Back here. In debt 12 miles below sea level. And nothing to look forward to. A depressing thought.

So does she understand this? I don't know what my girlfriend understands. Especially when she gets drunk and has fun and I'm stuck here doing the same shit nearly every weekend. We live completely different lives. Can we live them together?

I like this new Planetary Assault Systems twelve-inch. It's a nice return to Luke Slater's earlier output before he got illusions of pop grandeur. Very nice. I'd like to buy it. But I'm afraid to start chasing that dragon again, to get all obsessed about the "black beauty" and forget about life. Fuck that. I need to reconnect. I need to really WANT something again that feels achievable. Not just some goal in which I don't even know in what direction to take that first step--wherein my perfectionism inhibits me to a paralyzing degree--in which I do nothing.

But I'm ready to fight my way out of this paralysis. All the ideas are still there. All the creativity and energy and ambition... it's all there. I'm not tired. Frustrated? Of course. But not tired. It takes so little to inspire me. The smallest opportunity and I'm immediately hardcore dedicated. Preparation flowing at 120%. No time for much else. And that can be really fantastic. A great drug. Even better than the Nyquil and 2 Klonopin that I just took.

Most people are already alseep by now. Before 7 a.m. Not me. I need drugs to tell my brain to stop. Otherwise it can keep me up for days. I can't recall what my exact record is for consecutive hours without sleeping. I know it's more than 50. I've skipped 2 nights of sleep before. It feels like shit, but the mild hallucinations can be interesting. Mostly I just see human figures moving in my periphery. It's not scary. I know my brain is just tired and i'm seeing things that don't exist.

I guess this was a rambling post.
My girlfriend always tells me that I never have a point when I communicate.
But what's the use of having a "point"?
Fuck that. Communication is about the interaction, not getting some kind of message or bottom line outlined and bullited. Communication is expressing an idea. I don't need a goddamn point. I don't even need to follow a theme or stick to the topic that I may have begun with. My mind doesn't work like that.

And besides, this writing is for me. Not you. If you find any of this useful in your own life, then that's a cherry. It's wonderful, actually. I LOVE audiences. I'm a performer, by nature. When I perform for an audience that cares, it's one of the few times I connect with people, something I need to feel far more often. The lack, thereof, making me want to just end it all.

So... what the fuck was I supposed to be talking about... ?

Fuck it. I'm sleepy.
Drugs are quick.

Wait, before I pass out at my keyboard, here's some knowledge for those of you who don't know:
Marko Fürstenberg - "Cocktail Royale".
Buy it. I would LOVE to buy this record but Forced Exposure never has this slice of heaven in stock, even though it's been in their goddamn inventory for over a month now. The downside is that the c*(ksmack pressed FIVE FUCKING LONG TRACKS on this record. What the fuck was he thinking? He could have doubled his money by pressing a 2x12". I certainly love to pay extra for well-pressed vinyl. What vinyl enthusiast doesn't? Muthafuckers better recognize.
Knowhatimean?

I got a thousand more secret gems for you. All in my head.
If I was an obnoxious douchebag I'd be all like, "TIP!"
God I fucking hate djs.
What a bunch of assholes.
Not you, of course. If you're still reading this, then you are most likely one of the good djs. They're rare as hell. But they do exist.
So if that's you, one of the good ones, take some comfort in that. Even if no one knows who the fuck you are. Because you KNOW.
Ever been to a place where you're surrounded by people who KNOW? God that's heaven.
Sometimes MUTEK felt like that.
It felt like heaven.

Users Like 'Darksome Notes' Are The Shitstains Of SoulSeek

2008-04-18T05:34:00.006-05:00

[me] why the fuck did you ban me ?
(5:17) [Darksome Notes] read info!
[me] who reads every user's info before dl'ing? that's ludicrous
[me] and besides : "error getting user info"
[me] jackasses like you are the plague of soulseek
[me] this community was SO MUCH BETTER five years ago before assholes like you started getting on board
(5:20) [Darksome Notes] fuck you
(5:20) [Darksome Notes] lol!
[me] oh. that's all you got?
[me] "fuck you"
[me] how original

Cold Turkey Isn't Always Healthy

2008-04-18T02:23:00.005-05:00

M_nus the manic record purchasing I set into motion last month and am still paying for, I haven't spent any money on records this week. In other words, I haven't placed any new orders via my usual online sources: Forced Exposure, Dance Records, Juno, Warpmart or Discogs (and, as a very last resort, Ebay *gag!*) And guess what? I feel okay. I know there are incredible records passing me by... selling out... some destined to be trading for $20+ within just a few months. But this will always happen. So I can either spend all my time listening to every single new release and digging myself deeper into debt, buying the good shit, or I can spend my time doing other things like eating, showering, washing dishes, and perhaps even earning an income. And oh yeah... if I don't spend all my time buying records it gives me time to WORK ON MY OWN MUSIC. (Very important. Thus: bold, capitalized, and italicized.)

But I make it seem like an all-or-nothing route. The truth is that there's a middle ground. I can continue to buy records, and make time for my own projects. I just don't know if I'm strong enough to be so balanced. Just writing "balanced" is like writing a dirty word. It's harder for me to write (and comprehend) than "fuck" or "cunt" or "cocksmack." Really. Ask anyone who knows me and, for sure, they will not describe me as "balanced." When I do something that I love, I put everything into it to the exclusion of other things. Even important other things. And I'm scared that I lack the self-discipline necessary to buy just a few records every month. What does a "few" mean for me? 30 records would be a few. If I cut my record purchases to even 50 per month, that would be a drastic reduction from my current habit. That's how bad I need my fix. I've been buying hundreds of records every month for years now. And it has to stop. It has to. I cannot afford this addiction any longer. It has become a financial, emotional, spiritual, and physical burden. (Last time I moved into a new apartment I had very little help, and I completely fucked up my knee, hauling crate after box after crate of records up the stairs to my second-floor studio.)

So yeah. When I do something I love, I focus on it. And I love to buy records. So I'll sit in front of my computer for an entire day--sometimes more than 12 hours--playing "world's greatest detective" to find the records I want. Finding records I didn't know I wanted until I downloaded the mpfrees from SoulSeek and realized that I absolutely had to own the record because oh my fucking god it's just sick. Sick! SICK!!!

But you know what else I love to do? I love to sit in my living room (the only available space I still have) and make beats on my Korg Electribes. And I can do this for hours. But not 12 hours. There's a vast difference between creating and collecting. There's more of an emotional investment in creating. It's more exhausting. Scouring the Internet for records and writing new beats both take me to that place of non-thought. The Zen place. But making beats, working on my own music, that's so much more satisfying.

And buying other people's music is so much easier.

Sensuality

2008-04-10T05:16:00.007-05:00

My credit card debt has officially passed the $12,000 mark. Not like that's any kind of special number. It's just a big slap in my face saying, "Hey! Stop spending all your money on records, you fucking retard!!!"

Yes, I want to support artists.
But I should probably focus on supporting myself first.
I have no idea how i'm going to climb out of this debt.

Perhaps I knew this was coming. Maybe I wanted to exhaust myself, allowing records to consume my life in order to hit financial rock bottom. So I can finally admit that this shit has gotten WAY out of my control, that I need to form some better habits, like obsessing over my own music rather than everyone else's.

I would love to be able to buy all the records I want. But I can't. Especially not with my sub-poverty income. And even if I could afford all the records I wanted, it wouldn't be healthy.
My video professor told me, "The worst thing that could happen to you is if you were to become a millionaire... because then you could afford to buy every record you ever wanted. And you'd have so many records that you wouldn't even have time to listen to them all."
Damn was he right. And the ridiculous thing is... I already have more records than I have time to listen to. Sure, I listen to all the new stuff I buy. But I still have over a thousand records I bought for a buck or less at thriftstores and those public radio station fundraisers... sitting in boxes... waiting for my ear.
Time is a bitch. You can never beat it. Even if I were to live forever, it wouldn't matter. There's always going to be more new music than there will be time to listen to it all.

I have that weekly new release e-mail from juno.uk sitting in my inbox, the one with all the mp3 samples of brand new cuts. Should I look at it? Or should I delete it? I want to look at and just be very selective, only listening to a handful of track samples by artists I trust. But can I exercise that kind of self control? Or will I dump every single mp3 sample into winamp like I have been doing for the last year since I discovered overseas record retailers with kick-in-the-crotch shipping rates. Mailing shit over an ocean ain't affordable anymore, that's for sure. Another reason why so many people want to just stare at their laptops and play their Beatport or stolen Soulseek tracks.

The dilemma, however, with only listening to new tracks by established artists that I like is obvious: How will I discover those gems I would otherwise not have known about?
How would I ever have discovered something like Mountain People - "003", a track so fucking killer that I would instantly lose respect for anyone who heard it and didn't "get it." Period. That's how fucking great this track is. But if I hadn't been listening to every new techno release, I never would have known about it. Just like most of you reading this now don't know about it. And why would you? This record didn't receive the praise it certainly deserved. No Big Name DJ put it on their top ten list. It's not necessarily the best music that gets the most attention.

This is where I should step in. But I have no voice. No one fucking cares what I buy. I want to be "the world's greatest detective". I want to be Batman. But it's costing too much. Far more than money. At least if I were being paid well to play these records on a regular basis, that could be some justification for all this record buying. But I don't even have that reason.

And it's not just about the music. Otherwise, I'd just Beatport and Soulseek everything and be just as "exciting" (ahem) to watch like all you other laptop djs.
No. It's more than the music. It's about having something real. Something in my hands. Something I can grab.

Physical objects have energy. And I can feel this. When I'm dj'ing, and I'm in that zone where I stop thinking, the records tell me what to do.
I'm a sensualist.

Two E-mails

2008-04-09T07:10:00.006-05:00

To someone who purchased some records from me :

-----------------------------
hey, fuck ebay, huh?
discogs is where's it's at!

i just wish these guys would get their heads out of their asses and start promoting the retail end. half the people i know who use discogs on a daily basis didn't even realize they could purchase records via the site until i told them about it.

right now, there's too many sellers and not enough buyers. discogs needs to redesign the site a bit to let people know THEY CAN BUY THE RECORDS THEY'VE BEEN WANTING FOR YEARS...

my rant.

word.
-----------------------------

To my oldest brother :

-----------------------------

i do it because i don't have a choice.
i've been depressed all my life, and if it weren't for music i would have killed myself out of sheer boredom and a lack of purpose.
it's love. but it's a sick love.

something happened very early on. i remember being 3 years old and hearing "sweet dreams" on the radio. it changed everything. then there were all those synthesizers that rush was using. the angular danceability of talking heads. the reggae rhythms of police. all that stuff you were playing in your room was influencing me and i didn't realize it until years later.

everyone, including myself, was confused. "why didn't i ever learn to play a an instrument?"
well. i've become quite the fatalist.
and i know it's because i was meant to play machines.
i can always learn to play an instrument whenever i make the space and time. (i've been leaning heavily towards lap steel for a few years...) and for now, if i want live instrumentation, there's always a musician willing to collaborate.

i'm definitely going to "hang in there." no doubt about that.
there's only two possible outcomes here :
i'm going to make it or die trying.

but it'd be nice to enjoy the trying-to-make-it part a bit more.

~ s
-----------------------------

Chicken Soup For The Techno Soul

2008-04-08T07:02:00.004-05:00

I spent ALL day buying records on discogs, except for the break I took to pick up some Girl Talk cds from my friend's place. And I also made chicken soup.

I sent this e-mail earlier to my girlfriend :

------------------------------------------------
the first time i made the chicken soup it was okay. like little better than good.
this time, it's fucking great.
i finally got some cilantro and added that, which i forgot to use last time.
and i used a different process to strip the meat from the bones and fat, so i don't have to worry about stray bones and gross rubbery chicken joints.
i used a TON of red pepper flakes. it's spicy. and i used fresh garlic cloves and some garlic powder. it's garlic-y.
carrots. celery. onions.
4 chicken bullion cubes to emphasize the broth flavoring. some vegetable oil. some butter substitute spread. (not margarine shit!) and some adobo seasoning.
served over rice.
tastes fucking awesome.
i just wish i could share this with you :(

why can't i get soup that tastes this good at a restaurant where "professional" chefs prepare food...?
i think i know the answer, and i don't like it.
------------------------------------------------

It felt great tonight, taking hours to make that soup. Dissecting chicken parts like I'm back in high school with the cat, except now I'm using my bare hands instead of a scalpel. And the chicken doesn't smell like chemical preservatives.
I love records, but I hate sitting in front of a computer for more hours than most people's average workday, to find the gems amongst the manure. (And boy is there a LOT of crap to wade through...)
So NOT sitting in front of my computer--in this uncomfortable chair, hurting my back and killing my eyesight--and instead making that chicken soup. With my hands. With love.
That was phenomenal.

Note To Self : Take Frequent Breaks

2008-04-07T06:43:00.003-05:00

I got back from dinner and everything around 8 or so.
I messed around a bit with setting up a replacement amplifier for my computer speakers/monitors since the 10+ year old Iawa is flaking out in the left channel.
I listed some dvds in my Amazon.com inventory.
And I organized a box of electronic stuff: power adapters (wall warts) and video game controllers and excess computer/pro audio power cables.
Other than some of this and that, I've spent the entire night and early morning purchasing records on discogs.com.
It's 7 a.m. now. So minus the 2 hours for the other excursions, I spent the last nine hours listening to music and buying records. I left my computer occasionally to get water or to take drugs (mostly prescribed), but really I was focused on the music.
If I'm going to abuse myself like this, I should at least take frequent breaks to stretch, look at something other than a computer monitor screen, and go outside and take in some fresh air.
Awww shit.
I'm bad.

Not all addictions are bad, though. I once knew a super cool girl who was addicted to exercise. Like that's fucking awesome. I'm addicted to taking walks during the summer, and I hate these Midwest winters when I can't get out and go walk a couple miles every day.

The records aren't evil. They're seductive.
And I'm weak.

Stop Sharing Crap And PAY FOR MUSIC !

2008-04-05T07:12:00.008-05:00

So, after 3 hours of listening to music and buying records, I was planning on going to bed until I had this little interruption :

----------------------------------------
(6:44) [DJSinan] hi . , i need a track
[me] don't we all
(6:46) [DJSinan] just one fucking track
[me] three drives on a vinyl ???
[me] gross.
(6:48) [DJSinan] sure
(6:49) [DJSinan] take out three drives's all mixes bro
[me] what?
(6:51) [DJSinan] fuckin, i dont need three drives man , i think you want it
[me] ?
[me] it's in your share folder
(6:51) [DJSinan] no
[me] like it's fucking 2000 all over again and i'm suffering in some shitty aussie club
[me] no?
[me] um...
[me] yup
(6:52) [DJSinan] i m sharring 2.754 track man
[me] so?
[me] why should i put you in front of all these other people in queue?
(6:54) [DJSinan] couse 312 queue is too much ; )
(6:54) [DJSinan] maan i need this fuckin track
(6:54) [DJSinan] :)
[me] then go buy it
(6:55) [DJSinan] you did?
[me] how much do you spend on music every month?
(6:56) [DJSinan] sure! ..we have too many tracks in beatport
[me] ? you didn't answer my question ?
(6:58) [DJSinan] forget it man.. i m in this sector 15 years ago..
(6:59) [DJSinan] get it
(6:59) [DJSinan] you re really freak
[me] whatever, toy
(6:59) [DJSinan] ;)
[me] you're sharing almost 3000 files. so what.
[me] i'm sharing over 12,000
[me] and mine are actually organized in folders.
(7:00) [DJSinan] :) man you know everything
[me] sho 'nuff
[me] you buy records?
(7:01) [DJSinan] thats not my all
[me] please tell me english isn't your first language
(7:04) [DJSinan] yes buying or no ..so what?
[me] so if you aren't buying music, then you aren't supporting artists
(7:07) [DJSinan] that is true , i can think this. and i know but here is soulseek.and maybe we're here couse support artists but this fuckin program is not legal
[me] i have no idea what you're saying
(7:09) [DJSinan] forget it man
[me] no problem
(7:09) [DJSinan] yes u re true
[me] i already banned your artist-hating ass 10 minutes ago
[me] adios
----------------------------------------

People who message me, telling me "I need this!" and shit...that annoys the fuck out of me. Unless these morons have good shares, I pretty much ban them immediately on principle. Seriously, why should I move someone forward in my queue just because he bugs me?
Have I ever bugged a user like this?
Yes. Once. Just the other day. I've been waiting almost two fucking months now for this Steve O'Sullivan Quatre release. Because I'm pretty confident it's going to be great and then I'll have to hunt down the vinyl and buy it. As usual.

My favorite track tonight? Prins Thomas's Guade Loop. I played it 4 times.
It's on his Diskomiks EP. Funny thing is, I almost bought it on Discogs like an hour ago, not realizing that I ALREADY OWN THIS RECORD. This happens more often than I'd like to admit. Thank god for search engines in e-mail accounts. I save all my online purchase receipts, so if I have an inkling that I already own a record, I'll just run a search in my e-mail for the keyword.
Anyway. It's 7:30 a.m. Time to brush my teeth and go to bed.
My teeth brushing music? Guade Loop !!!
And then some Prototype 909 if getting ready for bed takes me longer than 6 minutes. Which it probably will. I'm easily distracted.

Might As Well Face It...

2008-04-04T06:20:00.001-05:00

I'm addicted to buying vinyl records.
This addiction seemed okay at first. But now it's obviously unhealthy.
Most people collect things in moderation. Well, I barely understand the concept of moderation; I've never done anything half-way. So what was once an exciting new venture into collecting became a crippling obsession.
I hesitate to compare my addiction to a serious drug problem only because buying records isn't unhealthy in a sharing-dirty-needles or destroying-my-liver kind of way.
But honestly, drug addiction is the closest kind of obsession i can compare this to.
A friend of mine said, "It's harder to stop buying records than to stop using heroin."
And although this may seem like an exaggeration to most people, it makes complete sense to anyone who shares this predilection for music recorded on vinyl acetate.

This is my first foray into the world of blogging. My first step towards taking some control back from the addiction that has gripped me too tightly for too long.
Perhaps, if I take account of my vinyl acquisitions, if I share my obsession publicly, I will discover ways to achieve some balance in my life, finally.
I am committing to self-enforced therapy to initiate permanent change.

With full disclosure.